It’s amazing to experience something you’ve read about for so long. In my mid-forties now, I was trying to find the truth about life for the last few years, after constantly being on the edge and easily provoked to react with anger.
Deep inside, there was another part of me, a part that was nice and mellow, ready to be there for my friends, ready to empathies with everyone and help when someone else was feeling blue. However, it took me a long time to realize that I wasn’t there for myself and that was the cause of my irritability, that was a cause of feeling stuck in this beautiful life that God gave me.
Realizing that you don’t know what to do with that gift called life, can be very scary. Living on the pilot, performing our daily ‘robotic’ functions can make you feel that your own life is flying by and you’re actually not part of it….However, even this realization is a sign that you’re waking up from a dream and after first wave of fear, I felt at peace. Not knowing is sometimes a blessing. We don’t have to know everything, we don’t have to plan everything, we just have to be here and be ready to accept that our life is a miracle and that we must be a crucial players in it. If we’re not, then we became walking zombies, full of unhappiness inside, while we are constantly trying to silent that voice from deep within which is calling and pushing us to open up our eyes and start fully living.